National Blog Posting Month

Under Pressure

I turned 32 in June. I was struggling with the feeling that suddenly I had to make all these life changes otherwise I would never settle down and have "the adult" life I felt a 32 y.o. woman must be ready to have. Finally, I talked to an old friend who reminded me that we all have our own time line. I've been feeling a lot better.

What 30s struggles have you faced? Or are you having? What do you love about your 30s?

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Permalink Reply by Brainsitter on November 5, 2007 at 1:09am: I love being 30. Of course I've only been 30 for a month, so we'll see how I feel a year from now. And for the most part I'm glad I'm through with my twenties, I just wish more people would respect the "personal time line." I was married by 22, and my husband and I have had many adventures together and plan on having more. But this whole, "So....when are you two going to have kids"-thing, is KILLING ME!!!! We want to have children, someday. And this "getting older" bit doesn't help my "someday" argument. This happens so frequently that it's fast becoming a big pet peeve of mine, as if my entire reason for being on this earth is to reproduce. But that's pretty much my only real complaint. That and gravity. LOL.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Eshchory on November 5, 2007 at 6:38am: I least you didn't have relatives praying to God to make you fertile!
I was married less than 5 years before I produced a baby but in that time whenever we went to family celebrations my aunts and older female cousins would kindly reassure my mother that she would have grandchildren one day and then they would turn to me with a compassionate expression saying they would pray to God to give me a healthy boy. Meanwhile the men would all joke with my husband that he was 'doing it wrong' and maybe we needed more practice.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by BipolarLawyerCook on November 7, 2007 at 5:06pm: Ugh. I am bitch enough to have said, "you're healthy, why don't you adopt some yourself?"; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Eshchory on November 7, 2007 at 9:16pm: It was all said with kindness and compassion. In their minds we had gone past the stage of the impatient chiding 'When are you going to have children?' to the stage where we were obviously infertile and therefore deserving of their sympathy.

They were all so caring I felt slightly guilty excepting their prayers for me 'under false pretenses.'

But I'd also be struck with the urge to yell at the top of my voice - "Contraception people! Have you never heard of contraception?"; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by mama's got moxie on November 6, 2007 at 7:33am: life changes? if you just turned 32 then you've been an adult for a while so what was it about 32 that made you feel like you needed to make changes? sounds to me like you've been comparing your life to others who are the same age. my advice is DO YOU and do what makes YOU happy.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by TheJerseyTomato on November 6, 2007 at 10:01am: One of the struggles I'm having is that my friends are getting old, and I don't seem to be. Not the "oh they are losing their hair and I'm lucky enough to have a husband who is growing his hair to Ren faire length for me" old but not wanting to go out old.

Now some of them have kids, and I understand a little of that. But many are just wanting to stay home and wash their hair. I blame them for my waning alcohol tolerance although it does make me a "cheap date"

Maybe it's because I don't "think" I'm in my twilight 30s. I'm usually mistaken for being 10 years younger and perhaps that's why I act it. Right now considering having kids, but still don't feel "mature" enough to have them. When I realize that at my age, my mom had a whole Girl Scout troop of 13yo girls to control, I so totally admire her even more.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by BipolarLawyerCook on November 7, 2007 at 5:05pm: I like to think that being a cheap date is one of my charms. : ); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jill Jaracz on November 12, 2007 at 1:27pm: A couple of weeks ago, I was "excused" from the coveted 18-34 demographic, which was a little slap in the face because I certainly don't feel 35, and I do feel like I should matter to corporate entities.

I live in Chicago, so my personal timeline is different than the one I grew up with in suburbia, and rectifying the reality of what my life is like now with the one I grew up thinking is correct can throw me for a loop sometimes. Not that I don't like my life--I do, but it's the whole "this is how life goes" brainwash that I have to shed.

I had a good friend breathe a sigh of relief that she was getting married before she turned thirty, and she's popped out 3 kids in pretty rapid succession. Meanwhile, I didn't get married until I was 32 and am still trying to sort out career goals before I have kids. So, my life is a little different than the norm, but that's OK.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jennic on November 22, 2007 at 7:58am: I turned 31 this summer. In my 20's I was insecure and unsure of myself and my goals. Now I know my visions and set my goals, and that has helped tremendously on the things that I choose to do and what I do with my time (for the most part!)

I hate gravity. And the wrinkles. And the white hair - I know, 31 it way too young to have them...; ▶ Reply to This