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What do you all think about the controversy surrounding nursing women and J&J's response?
I give J&J credit for commenting on the blog posts that refer to the issue as well as sending us that email saying "...In the future, we will be much more overt about these decisions..."
My hope is that through the activities at camp we can help them mold what an effective "blogger outreach event" really is, particularly as it applies to the "mommies." I do think that accommodating children in some fashion (even if childcare must be paid for by the blogger) would be important - and the nursing issue is one that should be addressed as those who feel "up to" bringing their babies in slings are certainly capable of multitasking. (A frazzled mom having difficulty with her newborn wouldn't be up to the challenge: it is a self-selecting process.)
I'll reserve full judgment until after I actually experience the agenda. After all, if they have us doing things that one truly cannot do with baby in tow, then I'll understand to an extent - but my guess is that most of the things can be done creatively by folks with kids.
They've tried to say that they really want this to be a "retreat" for moms, but of course the main focus will be product demonstration and the like. I imagine they are afraid people will miss the pitches if they have to go change a diaper or check on a toddler back in childcare. I get that. But I also understand that diapers can be changed discretely in the corner of the room while the mom still listens to the product pitch.
I'll be interested to see how this all plays out. I am really excited to go, and this controversy hasn't sullied my expectations, although I will definitely be curious as to how this event can be more inclusive to the target audience in the future.
Being a babywearing mama of a 7 month old, and a very creative multi-tasker (one has to be with as many kiddos as I have), I was a little put off by the fact that my nursing baby was not welcome.... Not enough to decide not to go, though! I do appreciate J&J's response and am super excited about attending!!
Hi everybody! I also can't wait to attend this event. I've never been to BlogHer as the last 2 years I've been busy being pregnant half the time! So I am really looking forward to meeting so many of you in person! As for the buzz the event, I'm sorry so many folks are being so negative. I understand it is really disappointing that there was a lack of communication - and that perhaps the event planners didn't quite realize what a unique group of modern moms we are - where many of us are home full time with kids but also running websites etc. I would have been CRUSHED if I could only attend with my newborn and then was told I couldn't bring him so I feel TERRIBLE for those that can not attend for these reasons. I am optimistic in the future they will be more inclusive of nursing newborns and perhaps offer a child care option. However to be honest, I didn't expect anyone to cater to the fact that I currently have a 12 week old baby who is breast fed - I guess given my past experience in Corporate America where a baby would never be allowed at a work conference, I didn't exactly expect this invitation to include my child - thus I didn't even ask to bring the baby. My husband is taking off and I"ll be dealing with pumping during the conference just like I would have if I had gone back to work full time when maternity leave ended. Truthfully, although I'll totally miss the 2 year old and new baby - it will be liberating to attend without my kids as I'll be able to spend 2 days focusing on networking, meeting new friends, learning about products in J&J's pipeline,and hearing the opinions of so many other Mommy bloggers. Not to mention it will be pretty cool to possibly sleep through the entire night for the first time in what seems like a lifetime! You know the drill - the baby finally sleeps through the night and the toddler is up with nightmares , getting sick, etc. Can't wait to meet you all!
I'll echo a lot of what Classy Mommy said. I have a 10-month-old and a 3.5-year-old. It didn't even occur to me that the invitation included them.
Although my mom, who watches my two children while I work full-time, did ask if I told J&J that I only travel with my "nanny" and children. She's so funny! (We can't all be Tori Spelling!)
I don't think I've slept through the night in 4 years between 2 pregnancies and the two resulting kids. It will be so nice to sleep without sharing the bed with my husband (I know that sounded bad) or keeping my ear to the baby monitor. I'll probably sleep like the dead.
Since I am still nursing, I will pump a few times a day (which I have been assured is no problem). Pump and dump because I totally plan on having a glass of wine or two since I will have no parental responsibilities!
Because I work outside the home, the baby is used to switching between bottle and breast. No problem.
I applaud women who feel like they can truly multi-task. But I can tell you I personally would be pretty distracted with either of my children in tow.
And, quite frankly I don't see why so many people are up in arms that a mom might actually leave her child for a few days and have some fun sans kids attached to her legs.
I've heard a few sentiments (from moms who weren't invited?) that J&J should be boycotted because of their anti-breastfeeding attitude. I think this is a little extreme and blown out of proportion.
This is their first "camp." I think we should let them work out the kinks.
(And of course I will miss my two children, and yes, even my husband. But I am also a woman besides being a mother and wife.)
I couldn't agree more. I am out of the breastfeeding years (my girls are 3 and 5 1/2 and I nursed my oldest until she was about 10 months old,) still I can hardly believe that J&J's intent was to ostracize anyone. It seems like we are all a pretty diverse group and with first time events it is so difficult to "reach out" to everyone, if not impossible!
Plus I think bloggers tend to have "blogger vision." For whatever that's worth.
Any way, it never dawned on me to bring my kids either. Yikes. I went on a girls' weekend with my best friend last fall and it was just heavenly. She and I are going to make it an annual thing.
I've never been to BlogHer, either, so I'm pumped about this event!
I didn't blog about it because I feel that others have drawn from their own experiences, whereas my knowledge of the situation is only through those other people's blog posts. As such, I started this discussion as a way to put up what I was thinking, but without devoting the issue to an "official" stance on my blog.
I was invited, accepted, and registered without issue. While I received the email the other day that addresses this issue, I wouldn't have had any knowledge of any controversy had I not read MGM's post and CityMama's post. As Susan Getgood notes, "The mistake was in not being explicit about the policy..." not necessarily about whether childcare existed.
As for the policy itself, I am confused as to how a baby-centric company couldn't allow breastfeeding mothers to attend. I did attend a (high school trustees') retreat without my baby and ended up missing more of the content of the program to go pump than I had if I had to quickly change a diaper (as nursing in the room would have not led me away.) But I knew that particular function would not be an "appropriate" place for a baby. What is? Well, I would have thought a gathering for women, especially mothers, would be more likely to allow discrete nursing. (Not "must," but just "more likely.") I would hope that a baby-related company would respect mothers and make the actual child-rearing act more "allowable." That said, I understand how this event could be of the type where having a slung-child would seriously hinder participation - but that should have been made clear.
Susan Getgood makes some excellent points about this as well as some other issues that came up in the planning of the event. For example, the mid-week nature of this retreat is great for business-folk, but not really practical for mothers. (And by the way, I hate being pigeonholed as "just a mother," but as this event is called "Camp Baby," the expectation is that we are putting on our "Mommy Hats!") As I said in the start of this discussion, I am glad that J&J is responding to the flurry of action and expect that next year's event (if there is one) will have more overt guidelines.
This event has the potential to be truly amazing - and I go into it with expectations of high-caliber. The chatter around the blogosphere is useful to gain various viewpoints, but by no means do I want to make generalizations of what will happen based on what has happened for a first-time event of this nature.
I have made plenty of mistakes when I take what I feel is the "standard" in one arena to another place where the expectations are different. Therefore, I am not going to come down hard on others who do the same.
Good points. I was a nursing baby-wearer, and I didn't do ANYTHING or go ANYWHERE without baby attached to me. It not only wasn't a problem, she just became part of me, to the extent that it felt decidedly weird when the time came to take off the sling.
On the flip side, I don't see how in the world any company could possible get everything right for an event like this, especially the first time. Heck, even at BlogHer, which has got to be the most woman and mom-centric event going, there were glitches. I had to arrive at the conference, for example, and found that there was nowhere to check my luggage until I could get to the hotel (I couldn't skip out and check in, because I was a scholarshipped live-blogger), so I wound up going from panel to panel--often up and down stairs because the elevators were intermittently out of service--dragging ALL of my luggage, laptop, cameras, purse, and of course the BlogHer tote they handed me when I got there! Stuff happens.
I'm just going to sit next to Kerianna and agree with whatever she says, because she is S-M-R-T. ;-)
OH--and one thing I have issue with has to do with scheduling. For me personally, I'd rather see the event wind up with the product expo at the end of the day, instead of adding another day to the trip...because I am neurotic and stressed when I'm away from my family, for various reasons. I'm a "get there, get back" kind of gal. But I understand that the expo IS the point of the junket, and that it's a big deal, and the company sponsoring the event deserves the time and space to showcase their product.
