You can lead a horticulture but you cannot make her drink.

Why I love my boys:

N: Why are there all of these antiques cars around today?
R: There is an antique car show at Hooters today.
O: How do you know so much about the Hooters schedule?
R: I drive by there every day to work!
N: He takes the scenic route!

or this one:

N: Why do girls' jeans have zippers?
R: So that they can take them off.
N: Well, I mean they don't need them except to tak… Continue

How about this for crazy - in just over a month, I will be standing in front of approximately 3000 people wearing a silly hat and robe, saying something which is meant to be inspirational and memorable to about 250 college graduates. Neat! As some of you may remember, my undergrad department chair nominated me as the commencement speaker, and damn if they didn't go ahead and invite me. And then triple damn if I didn't accept! What? Was I thinking? Plus R keeps telling me that we have to go… Continue